december story

one minute she was safely ensconced in her office on 23rd street, the next thing she knew, she was out on the street with her work things crammed into a cardboard box trying to hail a cab on tenth avenue. it hadn't been much of a job, she thought ruefully , but it was a JOB , and now she was back on the street again, with the dreary prospect of posting her resume online, talking to head hunters, going to interviews, and trying to sell herself to some bored middle management drone, who would be looking at her breasts(not big enough) instead of at her face, where his/her eyes should have been. the trouble with jobs she thought was that they were jobs and not doing work that made her pulse quicken and her heart throb with joy,the way it would if she was doing what she'd been put on earth to do, to be an artist.that's when it hit her- she was 35 years old, unmarried, childless and she was going to do what she'd been wanting to do for 30 of those 35 years, she was going to become a starving artist. she put her hand down as a cab pulled up and shooed it away. starving artists didn't take cabs they took the subway, and on her way to the station she threw her cad board box which contained all her office paraphernalia, into a dumpster,and set off to begin her new life. this is the first installment of my fantasy new life- in reality i am 57 years old, married with 3 children , stuck in a job that i need to keep because my husband has been kicked out of his job. i went to a retirement consultation, and they told me i could have retired 2 years ago, so i'm hoping and even praying to a god i don't believe in, that ian will get a job and i can retire in september, and spend the rest of my life making art and writing. and what of my fictional counterpart? her name is ingrid murphy, and you'll be hearing more of her fictional adventures in the blogs to come.

it's about time

hello again. no excuses, sheer fatigue and depression.. but i'm back and i'm holding  on and plan to carry on with a new positive attitude. i've gone back to painting mostly, combining figures and abstract art, and a whole bunch of new encaustic paintings, which i'm not sure i like, but i'm giving it a shot. . i don't really know what i'm doing, i should really take a workshop, but i can't afford it. so i'm muddling through on my own.. ian has a possible new job which would take some  of the pressure off me-i've been feeling like the major breadwinner for some time now. i've also been confused about what direction my art is going in,but right now i figure i'll just show up in the studio and go with the flow. where ever it takes me. i should close with some positve affirmations folllow your bliss, let your spiritual energy soar, believe in yourself, you are enough, life is a gift  go for the gold, hold on ,live for today- you already have all that you'll ever need, hope for the best, you get the idea but  i really mean it.  but i'm really tired and i have to sleep so i can get a headstart on my brand new positvd me. good night. brigid

squam at last

autumn

hello again
it seems autumn has arrived
without my noticing.
the temperature's dropped
 the wind is skittish.
i want it still to be summer
i'm not ready for this
my clothes are too skimpy
my thoughts too scattered.
i haven't even begun to figure out
where i want to go from here'
my art is indecisive
my plans incomplete-
how did this happen so quickly?
i have more to say
but no time to say it;.

i'll be back. brigid

re-entry

hello all- so tired. some time soon i'll write about squam, but not yet, i'm too tired, too overwhelmed with memories, thoughts and inspiration, and 3 days of playing catch-up at work, working like a dog. here are a few journal entries. i'm going to take this really slow....good night, brigid.

summer's over!!!

some pictures from my show

hello hello- i can't believe that my long awaited summer off is over in one week, and i have to go back to  work !i'm sure that those of you who have worked all summer don't feel a bit sorry for me and you're quite right. it is an absolute privilege to have the whole summer off, and i have to pinch myself quite hard to believe that i do have it. this summer has gone by so fast, i feel like i'm pedalling backwards to keep up. there is so much to do every day,that i never seem to have time to get to it all- i feel like i get up, blink,drink some coffee and it's midnight again and i have to think about going to bed. tonight i am going to start going to bed earlier so that getting up at 5:30 or 6:00 won't be such a shock to my system.this summer has been jampacked with art and all kinds of mindblowing experiences, so mind blowing that i can't even remember what they were tee-hee.i've had my work in 2 shows, spent 6 weeks at art lab, taken 2 e-courses, did some block printing (love it) and some encaustic painting (loved that too), am starting to think seriously about starting a creative business,putting my work up on etsy, designing a web page, and starting to  twitter and post more on facebook, lived thru a hurricane-we had to evacuate from my beloved beach house- no damage, all is well, many thanks to my wonderful sister kathleen and her husband alan who graciously put us up for the night and made us feel so welcome-that experience deserves a whole post of it's own. hilary leaves for london in two days and i miss her already. never mind that she would be going back to school anyway-i can drive to philadelphia and back in a day, not so london. i am truly happy for her to have this experience, but i will miss her terribly.anyway it's past my new bedtime already, so i won't bore you any more for the moment. be well, thanks for listening lol,brigid.

saturday dinner party

this is what i really look like

picture of me trying to take a self portrait in the mirror

hello hello, my guests have gone home and i am waiting until it's time for my son to go to bed, so i can have some down time. i'm not so good at entertaining- i don't do it frequently-usually because my house is a mess- but today we had friends over and had the best time! we started off at the ferry where we picked them up from mahattan and drove to snug harbor to show off my  etchings in the"process to print " show which has been up since july 9th . today was supposed to be the last day, but i spoke to the director who said they're keeping it up until monday so if you haven't seen it you have 2 more  days. i am honored to be in a show with pat decicco, bill murphy,&phyliss featherstone, to name a few of the talented artists whose work is showcased.we showed off the gardens and other delights of  the harbor to our friends who were duly impressed, and after the harbor we headed home,driving  along front street with it's fabulous views of the shore line, down past the beaches to our shady home in midland beach, which i grow more and more fond of as the years roll by. our friends thought staten island was like living in the country, a million miles away from the city. which in some ways it is, but in others-let's just say the traffic and s.i.'s drivers leave a little to be desired.once home, the kids pitched in and we had dinner on the table fairly quickly. hilary and alex were wonderful, making salad, setting out pre dinner snacks, getting the table set and the food on the table- we all worked together, and had a blast.. our friends, who we love dearly, seemed to have a good time and we plied them with jewelry, books and one of my paintings, which to my delight they seemed to love..it was truly marvelous to spend time with them- they are wonderful people i never get tired of, and we all promised to get together soon and to spend more time together, and it was great that hilary was still here-she leaves for london on the 31st- eek!i leave you with a quote from martin luther king:"all men are interdependent...our destinies are tied together." and so it seems. good night, be well, brigid.